You know sometimes you hear a song and it just stops you dead in your tracks and holds you captive? Well earlier this week I stumbled across a song that did this to me and it has been whirring around in my head ever since.
As parents we can’t choose our children’s path in life and this scares the shit out of me. Naturally I want the best for my son and daughter – happiness, success, love and the best of health. Who doesn’t? I can’t imagine having to send my child to another country in the hope that they will find a better life but I can imagine that you would do it in a heartbeat if you thought that it was in their best interest.
I think this song really hit me like a tonne of bricks as well, and had hot tears flowing down my face before it reached the shocking final words, because there’s a personal connection. My eldest brother died of a heroin overdose when he was roughly the age I am now, early thirties. I rarely talk about it because it still feels raw even all these years later.
I find it desperately sad that sometimes love isn’t enough. You can do everything in your power to try and steer your children onto a good path and to try and help them out of trouble but at the end of the day they are individuals and you can’t live their life for them.
Hearing this song has changed my perspective this week. Having young children is demanding, there’s no doubting it. We get caught up in the drudgery of sleepless nights, endless washing, tantrums and tears. I’m seeing it in a new light though and enjoying it for what it is. In the blink of an eye Sun and Shine won’t be children any longer, they will be adults living their own lives, making their own choices. I am so grateful to be in the position I’m in and have what I have and it’s all too easy to forget this. This song has served as a brilliant reminder to be thankful for what I have.