Last week I celebrated, well I should say we celebrated, our 10th wedding anniversary. I can’t believe it has been 10 years since we were married. I had a lovely time sifting through the photos and wandering down memory lane. I even got my dress out for a closer inspection and tried it on again just for fun.
I’ve already put these pics on Instagram but thought I’d pop them up here in this little corner of the blogosphere as well for me to look back at and smile.
I wouldn’t change anything about my wedding. I was quite young when I got married, aged 24, and in a way it made it easier to have the wedding we wanted. It was a simple, short ceremony up on the cliffs of the eastern suburbs of Sydney.
We wrote the ceremony ourselves and Bird wrote the wedding vows so the whole thing was very personal and took place in front of 40 of our closest friends and family. We had to get a permit from the local council to get married where we did and the permit restricted the numbers, something I was secretly very happy about!
I think if we had waited to get married later then we would have felt more pressure to have a big wedding with a reception in a more traditional wedding venue. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with weddings like that, not at all, but it wouldn’t have felt very ‘me’.
As I tried on my dress again the other day I was a weency bit teary. I let myself indulge in a little gushy emotional moment. You know how I have a tendency to indulge in those from time to time.
At first I was thinking about how I still love my dress 10 years on. I designed it myself and had it made by a good friend using lace I had found in London and Paris and a collection of lace from my grandmother and great-grandmothers’ wedding dresses. It felt so special wearing that dress for a day and all the emotion rushed back when I put in on again, a decade later.
Then I started thinking, hang on, nevermind the dress, really I can’t believe I still love Bird 10 years on and that he still loves me.
That makes it sound bad, like I didn’t believe I would still love him when I married him, of course I did, I am just amazed that we actually still do love each other. I know that for some marriages love isn’t enough, things happen, other problems get too big for a marriage to survive. I know that sometimes love just doesn’t stick around, despite neither of you wanting it to desert you. The romantic in me still believes that love can conquer all but there are two people in a marriage and both of you need to believe that’s the case really or romance won’t get you far, or far enough.
I am so grateful that despite the tough times – and there have been a few not-so-perfect periods, I’m not going to lie, life isn’t really always as pretty as Instagram would lead you to believe – we are still together and still both love each other and want to make any effort needed to keep that love held up. We hold hands and raise them up to keep our love afloat, above the messy rug on the floor, the toys scattered everywhere, the sleepless nights, the worry, the ratty bickering and the occasionally overcooked sausages and burnt bacon.
I hope we hold hands for many, many more decades to come.